fin de siècle

Black Tape for a Blue Girl

now my child, you would be five; through everything by my side
in this fin de siècle spirit; this age of selfishness
did we permit everything to slip away?
did i lose everything i believed in?
is there no tomorrow? only thoughts for today
is there no tomorrow? i trusted you

should you have been brought into this cold dark world
fatherless, abandoned with our child within
in this life there are no fathers not on heaven nor on earth
we spend our life searching for this lost fragment of our soul
immersed in self-indulgence is there no hope for beauty?
whose arms are big enough to hold my fears?
already i have more than i can bare.

this life i once opened to joy
now lies twisted in pain
this is dying and not loving
the honey now flows with blood

i will die with this guilt..... knowing i betrayed myself. 

Blind in Darkness

Diary of Dreams

I will plaster all you mortals with my dominating guts
I will torment revelations - I did never ask for much
I will taste the detonation while the geminis go wild
I'll absorb the human sigh, eradicate your dormant lie

Does it suck your breasts for milk, golden honey, dressed in silk
Does it feel your patient care in your dreadful glassy stare
or does it feel your true emotions in its scars and bruises burn
Do you really think your lies will tear open cloudy skies?

Feel my fingers in your wound while my eyes ascend the gloom
Questions wasting all my time - I see your eyes detesting mine
Sick of a life you never had, in dead motion, you look so sad
I could care less if I'd like - I let you go into the night

Is my ignorance my fate, or is my love distorted hate
Is deliverance my mate or am I sleeping while awake
Is this place that we call home adorned by devastating foam
Am I mortal, am I god - Am I brighter than you thought?

I will never beg for mercy - I will never kiss your feet
I will never ask forgiveness and all of that I want to keep!
I will guide the blind in darkness though I cannot see myself
I will whisper in a deaf ear while I know you cannot speak

And I hear rumours about angels…